Random equations in the mathematics of life

40 =/= 0

Sooooo I’m 40.  *crickets*  Yeah, that’s what I figured.  It was no big deal.  The world didn’t come screeching to a halt, my hair didn’t look any more grey than it normally does, small children did not turn tail in horror and fear.  I worked, I dealt with a situation with my car, and I went to dinner with my family, my mom, and my sister.  Pretty quiet all around, really.

I’m making good on my assertion that I need to be more true to myself.  The kids wanted to attend the first annual Pride Festival in Salisbury, and we had a blast.  But after posting some pics with some humorous commentary, I was met with some passive aggressive push-back.  The push-back doesn’t bother me in the least; I don’t expect my friends to always agree with me.  Variety is the spice of life, and I truly believe that with respect, even people who are diametrically opposed on some points can coexist without tension.  The passive aggressive thing just pissed me off, though.  So I posted this note to my Facebook friends, and sat back to see what happened.  Interestingly enough, I got several positive comments; some public, some private.  One person did “defriend” me, but I was truthful in the note: I didn’t miss the person, because I still haven’t figured out who it was.  Don’t really care enough to try, though.

I got a late start on SoFoBoMo, but I do think I’ll be fine to get it done.  The first shot will come tonight when I make these to bring down to Wilmington this weekend. (No sprinkles though; I don’t like the texture.)  We are going kayaking, to the beach, and then the Ranger and the Teacher are hosting a barbecue for us.  I can’t wait!  Alejandro is, of course, ecstatic.  He is hopinghopinghoping that we do indeed see the alligators that are quite possible to see.  I can’t blame him; I’d love to see them, too!  I would love to have a few shots of wildlife for my portfolio.

Speaking of…I joined 500px.  The idea is that you only post your pro level shots, and I like that.  I’m hoping to get some clear feedback from some pros and really hone my skills.  I like where my style is going, but I have by no means learned everything I should know.  A friend of mine in Texas, the Grandmother, mentioned that she’d love for her daughter, who is a budding shutterbug, to have me as a mentor if I was local.  I was stunned, to be honest.  I mean, I love to shoot with other people, share ideas and knowledge, but I have never thought of my abilities as good enough to mentor someone else.  It was a really cool compliment, and I appreciated it, but it’s making me take a hard look at my photos.  I still have a lot to learn.

16 days til I am back in the islands.  Every time I go down there, it gets harder and harder to come back here.  It feels like coming home, being at peace, smiling from my soul, and then having it taken away.  There are parts of my life here that I love, but I know that my home is there.  A little patience, and as many visits as I can afford will see me through until the time when I go home for good.  The Artist has actually shifted her life plan a bit to include the islands.  I have always respected my children’s paths, and when she started down hers with the intent of living in a big city, I will admit to wondering if that was what she truly wanted.  That isn’t meant in a condescending way at all; everyone shifts their path here and there in this life.  We start down a trail and realize it wasn’t quite right, and so we hop to another.  She made some remark yesterday about being afraid of “letting people down” if she dropped her double major and I told her she was quoting nearly verbatim, what her sister said last year.  So I explain to the Artist, as I did to the Professor, that what would “let me down” would be for them not to follow where their heart is truly leading.  Making adjustments is merely part of the process we go through.

The Scientist and I have settled into a peaceful coexistence.  We’re definitely not done with the repair work yet on the relationship, but we are currently in the midst of the longest span of time since September of 2009 in which we haven’t seen our therapist.  Should be interesting to see how it goes, and how we’re doing when we do get back in with her.  Our vacation schedules backed up to each other, and it just wound up that we couldn’t work out a time.  I am still a little wary, and am reserving judgment a bit, but we seem to be doing ok.

There’s a lot still swirling in my mind, and I’m not quite ready to put it here, but I just wanted to update and show the world that turning 40 isn’t the tragedy that people said it was.  =)

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Comments on: "40 =/= 0" (1)

  1. The One and Only said:

    Happy Late Birthday!
    This year will be my 17th Annual 30th. 😐
    40 was awesome, once I made it past the mid-life crisis.

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